The Church of Trumpetcat
 I swear to god if another Scientology recruiter comes up to me and asks me if I want a free stress test I am going to kill someone...do I have "prospective cult member" tattooed on my forehead or something? Sure I'm stressed but that doesn't mean I want to believe that we are inhabited by alien souls that were sent to earth in a prehistoric jet plane and planted in volcanoes.....really...couldn't L. Ron Hubbard have come up with something more realistic?  If its ok to just come up with religions then I want my own one too..I'm going to call it Trumpetcat...Trumpetcatists believe that the world was created by a giant cat named Harold who blew a magical trumpet to create the human race, unfortunately parts of Harold's godly trumpet became lodged in the human brian..causing us to become depressed and lethargic. In order to rid ourselves of these trumpet remnants you must rub yourself with gingerbread, collect bookmarks and shave your head.... ...oh and send me $10,000 for an official Trumpetcat starter-pack....
Elvis spotted in LA!
In Whole Foods in Westwood to be exact...is the king alive? You be the
judge...
Breaking News: Kate is back on coke!
 Well...sort of... This was so obviously planned, everyone knows that supermodels don't drink regular coke..they drink diet coke, vomit, smoke and then cackle at fat people...
Money troubles
 Actor Orlando Bloom's former management company is suing the Troy star for allegedly failing to pay $660,000 (�383,000) in commissions. Read the full story HEREThis probably won't mean much to Orlando since he earns about 12 bazillion dollars a film to look pretty in various period costumes. If you ask me this is all because the management company are jealous that Orlando looks good in period clothing. I mean..dont you wish just once you could ride down the street on a horse in armour..or go to Starbucks in a toga? No?... just me?.... ok then....
Sienna Miller..more like Sienna Icantdressmyself
 Ok, so me and my friend are having a heated debate at the moment..Sienna Miller vs Kiera Knightly...no you can't like both. My argument: That Sienna is bland, boring, famous for nothing and her fashion sense is waaaay overrated Her Argument: Kiera Knightly has a wierd face shape and pouts far too much I think I just won a point...so far we stand at: Kiera: 1 Sienna: 0 Image via Go Fug Yourself
mmmmm candy
Britney appears to be back on her ultra healthy diet of 10 truckloads of sugar washed down by an entire starbucks load of caffeine...These photos were taken outside Planet Blue in Malibu, in the space of about 10 seconds Britney manages to consume her daily requirements of junk food....First a red vine..   Then a lollipop...  ...and of course the requisite Red Bull...  Can you imagine how much sugar that poor baby consumed while she was pregnant? It was probably born and didn't sleep for 5 days...I'm not saying that eating sugar while pregnant will make your child a sociopathic insomniac killer ...but lets just wait and see how Preston Spears turns out...
|
