THE END OF THE WORLD IS NEARLY HERE!!
 A.K.A: THE TOMKAT WEDDING IS THIS WEEKEND! Oh god, it's like heaven for me when Scientology celebrities get married! Everyone from Jim Carey to Jennifer Lopex and Brooke Shields have landed in Bracciano, Italy to gawp at the bride, groom and alien baby princess in the ceremony of the year! Tom and Katie have been photographed all over Rome and have started taking baby Suri out with them!!! Is it wrong that I have a bit of a fascination with a 7 month old baby? Trust me, one day she will be leading us all in an intergalactic war!  Katie looks amazing...  Tom looks squat and bloated...  I would quite like to nickname him "Flumpkling"...  Suri looks like she wants to escape...  And also like she is looking through my computer screen and deep into my soul...
Days of our Lohan
 As usual Lindsay Lohan has had an eventful few days. First, she was photographed in London minus the wrist bandage she has been wearing for the past few weeks, revealing scars on her wrist. This has provoked some media outlets to question whether Lindsay has become a victim of self harm, or even a suicide attempt.  Lohan also chose to reveal some other aspects of herself and go out AGAIN not wearing underwear, for uncensored pics visit DListedThen she had a slightly-too-long smooch with ageing fashion designer Donna Karen at a party in London...  It was then revealed that Lindsay will star as the new face of Miu Miu, and will shoot the campaign in London this weekend. Finally GQ listed Lindsay as their "Obsession" of the year and celebrated this with a raunchy photoshoot and interview in which Lindsay appears very sarcastic.    INTERVIEW EXTRACT: We met Lindsay Lohan in the garden of the Chateau Marmont hotel in Hollywood. We had a margarita. She had a…beverage. Can we tell people we’re doing this interview in the men’s room at Yankee Stadium? Yes. And tell them that we’re dating. Does it make you sad that celebrity magazines never write about you? It does. I really wish they would do more. I’m trying to become friends with all the cool famous people, the ones that go to clubs all the time—try to get into those tabloids a little more. Tell me about an average day in the life of Lindsay Lohan. It starts out with a 5 a.m. hike through Runyon Canyon to watch the sunrise. Then I go outside, and I try to find the paparazzi. I go down to Robertson Boulevard, try and search for them, find them, and bring them food. And then what do you do at night? Well, of course, I’m sitting at the computer all night. Have you ever read anything interesting about yourself on the Internet? No. I wish they’d be clever and make something up for me. There’s some interesting stuff about you. Irocman39 in Skokie, Illinois, says you’re the “smokinest woman on the face of the earth”— God bless him. —and that he wouldn’t kick you out of bed for eating saltines. I don’t eat. Don’t you people know? It’s all about anorexia and bulimia nervosa. After computer time, when do you go to bed? No later than 9:30 p.m.—ever. On a good night, it’s eight fifteen. Dear god, more happens in this girl's life than happens to me in an entire year! Trust me, she is headed for Tara Reid status faster than you can say "firecrotch".
Maybe Nicole Richie isn't fat inside after all...
 Nicole Richie has hit back at claims (including the ones on this website) that she may have recently had a gastric surgery bypass reversed. She stated on her official myspace page: "So i gain a little bit of weight, and im acussed of having a gastric bypass surgery reversed? Its pathetic of Page Six to insinuate i have done this. Anyone that knows anything about this surgery would know that legally, you must be AT LEAST 100 pounds overweight to even have the surgery done, and is a serious, life changing procedure; not one to throw around as a joke or a rumor. Ive given a statement I am in the process of putting on weight, and that should be enough. Its a shame to hear that instead of hearing supportive words, someone needs to spin it into some negative, absurd way" Nicole was later spotted at a McDonalds Drive Thru casually eating amongst throngs of paparazzi flashes. I'm sorry but I'm not buying it, something dodgy is going on...what kind of person needs to see a nutritionist to understand how to gain weight? The way she has spoken about it you would think she was trying to discover how to fly or how to turn a piece of coal into a ferrari...gaining weight is pretty simple...you EAT. Next maybe Nicole will teach us all how to breathe or blink...one can only hope...   This was Nicole's reaction to the gastric bypass rumours  Classy.
Nicole Richie is fat inside.
 I just can't get my head around Nicole's exploits. She checks herself into rehab to get help for her eating problems..except noone is allowed to say she is on rehab or speculate that she has an eating disorder. Then, after 1 night she checks herself out and goes shopping and partying as usual...and now she appears looking like she is gaining weight. To me the only explanation is the rumour that has been circlulating in Hollywood for a while now, and was revived today by being posted as a blind item on Page 6... That Nicole had drastic gastric bypass surgery after gaining weight in rehab..remember gastric bypass is supposed to only be used for those who are clinically obese. Then, the weight dropped off...and kept dropping off as Nicole wasn't able to eat normal portions..hence her skeletal appearance. Now the rumour goes that "rehab" was just a guise for her to get the operation reversed!    Well, whatever it was she is definately starting to gain some weight and look a hell of a lot better, but what a stupid thing to do to get a fat person operation when you arent even fat! Do you see me going to get operations to become more dashing or to get a mane of raven hair rivalled only by a wild mustang? No.
Michael Jackson terrorised by transvestite
 Michael Jackson, who is currently in London preparing for a performance at the WMAs, is said to be fearing for his life after receiving threatening letters from a transvestite stalker. Jackson is reputed to have upped his security and has even taking to wearing a bullet proof vest when he is out in public. His stalker who calls himself Melanie is said to bombard Jackson with up to 100 letters per day. A source told the Daily Star; "This person is plaguing his life and has sent some seriously dodgy letters. They are from a man who works as a drag queen in the seedy Kings Cross area of Sydney, Australia. The content is eerie to say the last and this person is seemingly obsessed with Michael." "He writes all kinds of things, saying he knows Michael and wants to marry him. He tells Michael he needs to marry him. Michael has been having problems sleeping because of this guy." Hmmm...wow...what on earth could Michael Jackson have done to elicit such a strong response from a transvestite stalker??? Wait, while we consider that let me refresh your memory on some of the latest pictures I posted of Michael.  Yep, as I thought, a 48 year old man going for a nice walk in some skinny jeans, high heels and holding a handbag...nothing to incite a transvestite stalker there...
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